The Long Road Back
by slosh29
Summary: Sequel to Guardian Angel.Story takes place shortly after the wedding. Undertaker and Angel are in an accident while on the road.Now it is her turn to offer comfort and help at a time when he needs it the most. Will she mantain her sobriety and stability w
1. Chapter 1

The Long Road Back 

Angel looked out the window of her house when she heard the familiar sound of a motorcycle pull into her driveway. She pulled the curtain aside and felt herself smile. She saw Mark get off the bike and slowly walk up to the door.

She opened it before he got there. Instantly she gave him a hug, which he returned.

"How are you?" he asked.

"Get in here" she said holding the door.

He walked in and followed her into the kitchen. They sat down at the table. She got two cups and poured coffee before sitting down next to him.

"So you finally came to teach me how to ride huh?" she said hopefully.

He looked at her the way he did every time she asked, he knew she really wanted to learn.

"Not today. Besides, you have to wait to have more balance. That part important to riding. But I will, if I could teach Adam I sure can teach you, even with your thick head" He smiled at her.

"You love picking on me don't you?" she asked with a smile in return.  
"Its my favorite hobby right now." she just shook her head at him.

"How did you manage to get a day off?" she asked while sipping her coffee.

"I have only been off a couple days. I messed my elbow up again and the doctor wants me to give it some time off. I haven't seen you since the honeymoon and thought I would stop by." Since the honeymoon she was settling into the role of wife and housekeeper. She was planning to go back to work when Adam came back. Adam had gone to Japan for an extended trip. There was a lot of money to be made in Japan and instead of the usual 6-week stay he opted to stay for 8. Neither was happy over the separation so soon after the honeymoon but neither could deny that the money he made would be a nice nest egg. His character was more known over there so she wasn't particularly needed. Fans in Japan were more interested in wrestling than storylines.

"How is Sara, why didn't she come with you?"

"She is visiting her mother in Los Angeles. Her mom is not well right now. She had some surgery, nothing major but Sara wanted to be there. She will be home in a few days" he sipped his coffee.

"I'm sorry I haven't called. I didn't know." she had a guilty look on her face.

"Don't worry about it. We knew you were busy." Mark smiled at her. Angel caught his meaning and gave him a playful slap on the arm.

"Actually I am here to visit and talk business," he added seriously. She gave him an almost angry look.

"I already turned it down. Vince has some angle he wants to use me in until Adam comes back. I don't want to work without Adam," she said plainly.

"Did he tell you the idea?"

"I didn't give him the chance. Adam already told me enough because he called him first. I'm not interested in giving some low card no name wrestler a push. He did that with that kid before he left and not only could the kid not wrestle but we looked like idiots. He was probably 2 weeks out of wrestling school. Vince has been using Adam as a jobber." she shook her head.

"You sound more like Adam every day." he smiled at her. He knew that was probably word for word what Adam said because the kid was really bad. "Not every angle works out. But I think this one would. You would team up with a name and set up an angle for Adam when he gets back. If things work out as Vince hopes it could set up a series of pay per view matches. And some major money. Not to mention the fans are writing complaining that you aren't around. You are still hot. The window doesn't stay open forever. He called Adam back and he said its up to you." she was still shaking her head.

"So who is the loser?" she shot him a sarcastic look, one of her best.

Mark didn't say anything for a second or two. He put his head down. When he raised it up again he had a smile on his face. Realization hit her right away.

"No way." she almost choked on her coffee.

Mark nodded his head.

"How can that work. You are the Undertaker. What in the world would he want with another wrestlers manager?" she almost laughed.

"Well, thank you very much!" he said stoutly. He knew he was playing but she didn't.

"I didn't mean it like that. It just doesn't go with the character." she was becoming interested and he could see it.

"He wants me to turn back to heel for a while and bring back the Taker of the ministry days for this angle, then back after its over." he could see her eyes widen with the possibilities.

"You're kidding. What does he want you to do? Possess me?" she said with a laugh.

Mark didn't say a word. He just gave a shrug of his shoulder, which said yes.

"That would never work. It would look silly. The fans know I am married to Adam for one thing, and that Angel would never leave Adam. They would never buy it." she grew very serious.

"Sure they would. They know it's not real. They watch for the stories. They bought into it before and they would again. If it works out we would end up at main event status for at least 3 pay per views. You know gimmicks have to change. Vince is usually right about his instincts."

"Sure he is, like the kid the last time." she smiled to herself. Inside she thought it would be fun. They would have time together to hang out that she had been missing. "How could they do that with him in Japan. Why would Angel just show up?"

"Vince thinks we can fly Adam in for one show, set it up, leave him injured. I take you and while he is off for his 'injury' he can go back to Japan for the rest of the dates. That gives us 5 weeks to set it up since he has been gone for 2 already. And in between we can do the signings and charity work you like so much. I want to do this. I haven't worked with you yet. And we can have some friend time on the road." he caught her smiling.

"You really want to do this?" she asked. "I just got to the point where I can walk normally. What happens if I make a mistake or trip?"

"That is your self doubt talking. You haven't tripped yet. You almost can't tell anymore" he reassured her.

She thought for minute. In spite of herself she did miss the road. And she missed the boys a lot. She reached up and felt her necklace. Mark couldn't believe she still wore it. He saw her play with it all day on the day of the wedding. After a while she nodded her head. They stood up and hugged.

"Don't worry, it will be a lot of fun. You only have to work part time and we will have a ball. This one will be easy. I will be doing most of the work," he laughed, and again she gave him a playful smack.

By the end of the week she had gotten her itinerary from WWE and was packing her bag. She was excited because today would be the day and she was going to get to see Adam. They had decided to stay in Houston and bought their house there. Vince was kind enough to schedule the event in Houston so she wouldn't have to fly out to meet him and have a little more time with Adam. After she finished packing her bag she looked at the clock. She had a few minutes before Mark was going to pick her up. It was raining and dreary. She went out on the back deck and sat down. Looking around she reached in her bag. She grabbed a cigarette and lit it up. In spite of losing the rest of her demons she still hadn't lost this one. She only had one once in a while but had to do it in secret. Adam hated her smoking and she knew Mark did.

She took a long drag and inhaled, and then she heard a loud voice behind her.  
"What in the hell are you doing?" the noise startled her so much she tossed the cigarette and started coughing badly.

Mark was standing there with his arms crossed over his chest. He was trying hard not to laugh because of the look on her face when she tossed the still burning stick over the porch railing. She looked like a child who just got caught with a piece of forbidden candy. After half a minute of her coughing and sputtering he walked over and lightly patted her on the back.

"I told you those things would kill you." he started laughing now, which only made her angry.

"You will kill me quicker sneaking up on me like that dammit! Don't you knock?" she still had one or two coughs to go.

"I did but you didn't answer. I figured I would scare you less by coming in the house than sneaking around the porch. Adam and I both know what you do when you are back here." He picked up her bag and held her hand to stand up.

"I only have one once in a while." she said innocently. Even after all this time she felt she needed to explain herself.

" I am proud of you that you have cut that much but you need to quit. That is part of the past." he shook his finger at her.

"I plan on it. I only have one when I am nervous. It's better than a shot of Jack." She smiled. He didn't take the joke kindly and gave her a stern look.

"Not funny. Come on, we have to get to the airport and pick up Adam. If you don't behave I will tell him you were smoking and see what he thinks of your joke."

They walked out to the truck and he helped her get in. He often kidded that he needed to buy a step stool to help her get into it because her legs were so short.

When they got to the airport they sat waiting for the plane to arrive. After half an hour of her fidgeting she got up and started pacing. He watched her go back and forth for a while trying to read his paper until he noticed a wobble in a few of her steps that still happened from time to time especially when she was tired. He finally grabbed her arm and led her back to the seat.

They finally heard the announcement that his plane had landed. She instantly stood up and walked toward the gate. They had only been separated for 2 weeks and to her it felt like a lifetime. She watched each person depart and finally spotted his blond hair turning the corner. Adam ran down and dropped his bag and picked her up with a hug so strong she could barely breathe. They kissed passionately for a moment. He put her down and noticed Mark standing there. They had become almost as good friends as Angel was.

"Hey Mark, long time no see." he reached his hand out and Mark took it.

"Too long. We have to get together when you come back so we can take your hog out."

Mark had taught him how to ride and he had a bike of his own. Mark knew Angel loved riding and had no fear. Adam learned very quickly, he loved the ride but had no craving for the speed, but Angel loved the speed and couldn't get enough.

They noticed several people had started to recognize them. All three had sunglasses on and Mark had his coat on to cover his tattoos but no matter what he did people always picked up on who he was as soon as he stood up.

"Let's get out of here while we can." Adam said grabbing Angel's hand. She held his hand tightly the whole way to the truck.

They drove to the arena. Luckily he had tinted windows so none of the fans saw who was inside. Vince had managed to keep the news a secret so it wasn't even on the Internet that they were coming. They drove inside the arena.

Mark and Adam went over the plans again. When Adam left he was having a feud with Kane. Adam had won the last match between them because when he had hurt Adam in the ring he started chasing Angel. It almost looked like a rematch of the fight that Kane was in with Matt. But this time she grabbed a chair and hit Kane on the head. The crowd erupted and Adam pulled Kane back in the ring with one move and a pin. Kane got angry and hit Adam with a chair, which was to explain his absence when he left for Japan. The fans were very mad at the injury of their latest fan favorite. Kane had recently been fighting with Big Show for a buildup to tonight. The plan was that Kane would be in the ring waiting for Show to come out. Vince would come out and say that Big Show was out due to injury and they had found a replacement. Adams music would start and Kane would be ready with a scary smile on his face.

They went over her role in this. She was to simply stand ringside until Kane beat Adam again. She would enter to help him. Kane would come after her again. She would run around the ring and grab a chair. She would reenter the ring and stand over Adam to protect him, as this was one of her gimmicks. Kane would signal, the lights would go off and on and Mark would show up behind her. He would grab the chair and throw it. The lights would go off again with the screens showing lighting and effects. The ring would fill with smoke, and when the lights came back on Taker and Angel would be gone. Kane would finish stomping on Adam until Rey would make a save and a stretcher would take out Adam to explain the remainder of his absence.

They would do some promos showing Taker doing a ceremony and she would be his 'valet' for lack of a better description until Adam came back and fought Taker to win her back.

Mark came in for some last minute instructions. Angel laughed at him when he checked in before leaving for the ring. This was one of those rare opportunities to give him some ribbing back.

"You look like the Dutch Boy logo," she said snickering at Mark in his denim overalls and hat that hid his Undertaker leather pants and top.  
"Smart ass. You wait till we get on the road. You are going to pay for that one," he said laughing at himself. He could only picture how he looked. Several of the boys heard the joke and starting laughing. Mark gave them a frown and a look they often saw in the ring. They all stopped laughing and he turned back around and had a slight smile.  
"See you in the ring. Just remember to be in the left top corner. It's going to be dark and I can't always see so I need to know where you will be."

She nodded to him and he left. She was still chuckling under her breath and could feel Adam shaking with contained laughter himself.

She sat in the back with Adam as long as possible. They had gotten ready together. When it came time to get ready for the entrance they kissed again and headed towards gorilla.

Vince came over and briefly welcomed Adam and Angela back.

"Don't worry, this will work," he said grabbing a mike and getting one last dab of makeup. Angel had her doubts but it was too late now. Kane heard his music and walked out. They waited while he did his gimmicks and watched Vince go out. When he made his announcement the crowd was silent. Then Adams and Angel's music started. The crowd erupted and the noise was almost deafening. They walked out to a welcome they had never imagined. Their popularity had surpassed anything that Matt and Angel had.

The match went as planned.

Mark heard the reaction and smiled to himself as he watched the monitor under the ring waiting for his cue. He saw Kane's signal and rolled out from under the ring and in the dark nearly bumped into Angel. He took his place behind her. When the lights came on the arena again erupted. She turned and looked at him in horror and backed up. The lights went off again and she felt him pick her up and carry her quickly to the back.

The fans had bought it and were clearly riled as the EMT's brought Adam back on the stretcher.

They prerecorded the promos to be shown on the next week's show of her being possessed and waited to leave. The feedback from the fans was immediate. Vince was clearly happy. They would find out later that the very next show that Mark was booked at sold out in record time to see what came next.

The next day Adam had to fly back to Japan. He and Angel had spent the whole day together. Mark picked them up and they sat in the back and never said a word. He saw them holding hands the whole way. He could see Angel wiping tears in his rearview mirror.

They still didn't say anything the whole time waiting at the gate. They heard the boarding announcement for his flight and the tears started in earnest.

"Don't worry. I will be back soon. You have the number to reach me at the hotel. When I come back we will go to dinner and for a ride." Adam stroked her cheek with his hand. She turned and kissed his palm. He grabbed for her and hugged her as long as he could.

"Take care of her Mark, you know she likes to cause trouble." Adam warned with a smile.  
"I know that, she is in trouble most of the time anyway." Mark discreetly walked away so they could have the last minute alone. He kept watching from a distance and saw her face as Adam disappeared around the corner. She stood at the window until she saw him take off.  
Mark walked up and held her shoulders. He could feel her sobs and knew exactly how she felt.

"Lets go. He will be back before you know It." she nodded and started walking. He kept his arm around her shoulder. Her head was down the whole way out of the airport and all the way home.

The next day he drove to the house to pick her up. They had to fly out for the first installment of the new storyline. They would be on the road for about a few days then back home for a break before going out again as Vince had promised her a part time schedule until Adam came back.

He pulled into the driveway and knocked. No one answered the door so he knew where she was. Mark didn't want to scare her this time so he walked around the house and saw her sitting on the deck with her bag next to her and her coat in her lap. They were going to be close to her hometown in New York at the end of the tour, where it was almost winter and quite cold compared to the warm comfort Texas had to offer.

She didn't jump when she saw him. It bothered him that she looked so sad. But he also understood why she did. He felt the same way every time he had to leave Sara until they got used to it. Mark stepped up on the deck and sat down.

"You ok?" he eyed her carefully.

"Yeah, I will be once I get busy again. I can't wait for this part to get easier." she started to get up and he stood and reached out his hand like a gentleman. Mark picked up her bag and coat and they quietly left for the airport.

They had been on the plane for an hour with no conversation until he finally decided to start one.

"Are you going to stop by and see family?" he didn't know if that was the right thing to say. He knew how she felt about her family. But they were only going to be 50 miles from her hometown.

"No way. I have as much desire to see them again as I would to see Matt. It's funny. I don't mind the cold when we travel but the idea of going there makes it seem colder." she looked out the window and was silent again.

"We aren't going to have a week like this are we?"

Instantly she knew how she must have looked. That mood had to stop and soon.

She looked at him and smiled. Mark watched her reach into her purse and pull out a deck of cards. That was one of her standbys to pass the time on the flights.

That night was the first appearance of her character associated with Taker. The fans instantly hated him. They became quite vocal when she came out dressed in similar black leather. It was the reaction they wanted and hoped for. Angel wasn't very sure of herself. By association with him, whether by choice or not, had turned her into a partial heel in the fans eyes. They had allowed some play in the taped segments to make it look like she was enjoying herself which made her look like she was going against Adam.

They had made it through the first date and only had to do New York then home again. They had made it in late the night before and managed to get a few hours sleep before the light in the windows told them to get up again. The weather had been colder than she thought it would be for this time of year. She had grown up with snowstorms and squalls and knew it was early for this kind of cold. They were going to fly out to Houston for a few days off and Sara would be home by the next day. Then back on the road again.

She sat alone in her hotel room talking to Adam. There was a knock at the door. She yelled to whomever was there to come in. She saw the door open and Mark walked in.

"Mark is here, call me tomorrow night I will be home by then. I love you." she said quietly and hung up the phone. Mark looked at her funny for a minute. Then she knew she was in trouble.

"What?" she asked wondering what she did this time.

"Don't let anyone in that you don't know. What if it hadn't been me?" he still talked to her sometimes like a kid and she still often deserved it.

"The only other person who would have come in that I would have to defend myself against would be room service with a butter knife." she tried joking but knew that was not going to work. He shook his head at her.

"Want to get away for a while before our flight?" he asked.

"Sure, what do you have in mind?" that kind of question usually meant dinner at a Burger King on the way.

"I was reading a local paper and I found a bike I am thinking about buying and I want to test drive it first. It's new but I want to be sure. I think if I can get my mechanic and detailer on it, it will look cool. Want to go for a ride before our flight? I got directions from the front desk. We will be back in plenty of time for the arena. You can get your mind off Adam for a while." he saw her almost instantly jump up. She loved to ride.

"Lets go!" she grabbed her coat and started for the door. Mark found himself in an empty room staring at where she had been a minute ago. He smiled again. It was so easy to make her happy and she sure needed it right now. He walked out and pulled the door shut behind him.

They drove out of the city for a while. The dealership was about 20 miles away but she knew that they were headed for the country. In this part of the state anything that wasn't in the city was very much country. She hated the country. After spending a lifetime in a boring town she far preferred the city to the hills and winding roads.

They pulled into the dealership and after some small talk with the salesman Mark left him his keys to the rental car and took the keys to the bike. They walked out to it and as the salesman went over the details, they all did up their coats. Angel put on her gloves. It was cold enough they could all see their breath.

"I just want to try it out for an hour or so and I will be back. If I do get it, we will have to have it shipped to Houston." Mark said.  
The salesman was beside himself. His kids all knew the Undertaker and he would be able to go home and tell them he sold a bike to him, he might even be able to ask for an autograph. Most of all the man was amazed at how tall he really was. It was all the more funny because he was standing with a petite woman that came to his stomach.

"Of course, no problem, we can do whatever you want." the salesman stammered. Mark got on the bike and she came up behind him and grabbed his shoulder for support to get ready to get on the bike. She started to lift her leg up but he stopped her.  
"Hold it. Don't get on this side." she thought he was ribbing her, but could tell by his look he wasn't.

"When the bike is hot that side has the exhaust. If you step on it or get your leg too close to it, it will burn. I thought you came from family of bikers," he teased.

"You got on that side! They are bikers; I just left before they taught me to ride. And I won't ride with a drunk so I never got to." she was very embarrassed as she went around. She noticed the salesman stifling a chuckle.

"I am tall enough I can get on without having to stand on something to get there." he said in a serious tone to try and stop the embarrassment he saw on her face.

"Do you have a helmet sir?" Mark asked.

"Yes we do. I will be right back." the salesman walked quickly to the building and returned with a black helmet. He handed it to Mark who handed it back to Angel.

"I don't want to wear that. Who knows who's head has been in it?" she whined.

Mark got off the bike when she didn't take it and gave the salesman a look that told him to walk away for a second.  
"You had a skull fracture a year ago. You had a serious brain injury. Either wear the helmet or you don't ride." he gave her his usual parent tone.

"You have to wear one too." she shot back with triumph in her voice. He put the helmet on her head carefully and did up the strap.

"I have been riding for years and I don't have a brain injury," he said calmly.

"I don't know about that one." she shot back.

Mark walked over to the salesman and shook his hand.  
"New York has a helmet law sir, I can get you one too if you like." the salesman offered.  
"We aren't going that far. Besides, it looks so empty out here do you even have police?" This town reminded Mark of the endless redneck jokes.

"We do but they are in the next county" the salesman laughed in spite of himself. He even knew how desolate the town looked to an outsider.

Mark got on the bike and started it up. Angel grabbed his shoulders. Mark made a mental note to talk to Adam about that. If he let her get in the habit of holding on that way it had to be broken soon. He knew she had only ridden with him a few times.

"Grab my waist, and lean with me on the turns." he said. She grabbed his waist and he let go of the brake. He could see her smile in his side mirror.

They had ridden about half an hour. Mark was wishing he had worn regular gloves. All he had on was riding gloves with no covering on his fingers. It was getting chilly. They passed down endless roads that had nothing but a farm about every 5 to 10 miles. It has started to rain slightly. He made a mental note to turn around in a few minutes.

"How could you hate living like this?" he yelled over the motor and exhaust.

"Its very boring when you have nothing else and have to drive as far as we have gone to see a movie or a store." she yelled back.

He negotiated a few turns. Mark felt her grip leave his waist and turned his head to see her arms stretched almost like she was flying. He knew that feeling. Often he wished he could do the same thing.

"Go faster!" she yelled to him. He looked down at the speedometer. They were going about 60. He added about 5 more and decided no matter what she asked he wouldn't go faster. It was different when he was alone but he wasn't this time. He felt her grip return to his waist. He started to slow down to turn around. The bike was starting to slide a bit. He stepped on the brake harder and he felt a slip of the back wheel. He was slowing down but it was getting harder to control the bike. It was almost they were on a glaze of ice. He looked down at the speedometer he saw it said 35. The last thing Angel heard was "Oh shit!"


	2. Chapter 2

Angel opened her eyes and looked up at a cloudy sky. She was sore in so many places but knew she didn't go out. She slowly moved her arms and found they worked all right. There was a familiar pain in a finger. Her legs moved when she told them to. Her back was hurting pretty good but it wasn't any worse than some of her previous injuries.  
Angel lay there for a few moments trying to figure out what happened. She was on the bike and now she was on the side of the road, partially on grass and partially on gravel. After a moment she thought of Mark. Where was Mark?

Slowly she turned on her side. All she saw was winding road behind her and miles of nothingness. She turned her head and what she saw made her scream in panic. With considerable effort she got on her feet and ran to what she saw. She already had tears in her eyes by the time she got there.

Angel saw the motorcycle and a tree but could barely see Mark. She saw a leather coat and hair. She ran to the bike. The heavy bike lay on top of one of his legs and his back was up to a tree. The jeans on his leg were torn and bloody. She could see his other leg looked the same except the bike covered her view from the knee down.  
His hair was covering his face. Angel ran around and pulled his hair out of the way, groaning when she saw his face was covered in blood and his eyes were closed. She was terrified to know the truth but she had to know. With fingers shaking she felt his neck for a pulse and put her hand on his chest. She let out a sigh of relief when she felt not only a pulse, but felt his chest rise and fall steadily beneath her hand. At least he was alive.

She felt in all her pockets to find something to try to wipe his face off. Then she realized she left her purse at the hotel and had little in her pockets. She felt for her phone and found it. Pulling it out she swore aloud when she felt it break into pieces in her hand. She grabbed the bandanna off his head and started wiping what she could. After a minute or two she heard a low moan. Normally a sound like that would hurt a person to the core but in this case the sound was as sweet to her as birds singing in the morning.

"Mark!" she yelled. When he didn't respond in the way she wanted she found herself shaking terribly. Realizing her panic wouldn't help anyone she made herself take a breath and try to calm down. She kept repeating his name softly and kept trying to talk to him.

She felt a hand softly touch her leg. Reaching down, she saw it was as bloody as his face.  
Taking his hand in hers she kept talking to him.

"Squeeze my hand if you can hear me," she said softly. She felt a soft squeeze and was rewarded when his eyes opened slightly.

His face twisted in pain and realization as his senses slowly started coming back.

"Are you all right?" he asked, remembering what happened and who was with him.  
"I'm fine." She kept trying to wipe the blood from all the places she could see.

"I should have worn the helmet," he joked and winced at the pain the effort caused. He closed his eyes trying to isolate the pains he was feeling.

"I think my legs hurt," he managed to say.

She looked down and hated to say how bad they looked. He tried to pull his leg slightly to get it away from the pressure it was feeling, but the added pain caused him to yell in agony.

"Stop pulling. The bike is on top of it. I'm going to try to get it off," she said in a voice that he saw as panic.

"You can't lift it. It's too heavy for you," he tried to say but she was already running to the side.

She grabbed it and started lifting. The efforts were for nothing, as the bike wouldn't move under just her efforts. Mark could hear her groans and heard her ask God to help her. Then he smelled something burning.

"Let go Angel. Let go!" he yelled. The loudness of his yell was the only thing that got her attention, and she gave another feeble effort before she finally gave up. When she let go she felt pain in her hands and looked to see her gloves had been burned through. She realized then that she was trying to lift the bike by the exhaust on one hand and another part of the engine with the other. Both parts were almost red-hot from their ride.

She slumped back from the bike, her shoulders hunching in defeat. It took a minute for the pain in her hands to subside, and she had to battle to keep her emotions under control.

"Come here," Mark said softly. Slowly she crawled to him. "Let me see."

Angel grimaced and pulled the gloves off, which caused more pain than before. Amazingly her hands were burned but not as badly as Mark thought they would be. The leather had been burned through and some spots were blistering already.

"I have to get the bike off," she said breathlessly and tried to get up.

"No, just wait," he said, "It's not like the bike's going to fall on me, it's already there. Just wait a few minutes and try to find something to lever it up with." He laid his head back down. Panic was seeping in to his soul when he realized the pain in his legs was being replaced by a numb coldness.

Tears of frustration were flowing down her cheeks. She waited like he said and tried to summon up some energy. After a few seconds she noticed that his right arm was slowly dropping down to the ground, and she leaned over him to check on him. But his eyes were shut again and he appeared to be sleeping.

She looked around and noticed a line of trees a hundred yards behind them. With effort again she got up and wobbled over to them. After quite a while of looking she found a fairly large, thick branch of a tree that had fallen. It was almost too heavy for her. She dragged it back to him and checked him again. His eyes were still closed but she heard his voice.

"You're back," he whispered.

"Of course I'm back. I found a tree branch. I'm going to try to put it under and when I do pull your leg out if you can," she said breathlessly. He nodded and she pulled it into position.

"If it doesn't work don't try again." She looked at him knowing what he was probably thinking.

"It will work. Just get ready." She put her hands on the branch and took a few breaths. He reached down with his hand and grabbed the pants leg. Grunting she lifted the stick as much as she could. She had to position it close to his leg to be able to get the right area up.

"Now!" she yelled using every muscle in her body to hold the stick up and even made herself pull it up an inch farther. He pulled as hard as he could. Finally he was able to move it out of the way as he heard the stick break.

Angel heard the stick crack and opened her eyes praying his leg still wasn't under there. When she saw that it wasn't she dropped it and ran to him. Now she had more room to move around him.

"We have to get you away from the tree." She knew he might have a back injury just by the way he was laying there but she knew she had to get him flat. Then she detected the smell of gasoline. Either the fall or the stick could have put a hole in the fuel tank.

She reached under his arms and tried pulling, and he put his elbows down in an effort to help. They managed to drag a couple of feet before they both lay down in exhaustion.

When she got her breath back she bent back down to check again. His face no longer had the look of agony. Now it just looked in slight pain and total exhaustion. She moved down to his legs frowning at the ripped material. She grabbed it and ripped it open as hard as she could.

Grabbing the bandanna and trying to wipe up more blood, she felt the leg for broken bones. Looking carefully, she now understood why there was so much difference. He must have been dragged for a while before heading to the tree. Not feeling broken bones she switched to the right one. His left leg looked much better than the right one.

Repeating the process she ripped the jeans as much as she could and started feeling his leg. When she got down to the area the bike rested on she felt a bone out of place but he had no reaction. His left leg was torn and bleeding, the right leg had many ripped places and she could see gravel and pavement embedded in some of the many cuts on that leg.

Looking back up to his face she saw it was streaking with blood again. Again, she wiped it as best she could with the now soaked bandanna.

"Are you sure you're all right?" he asked quietly. She nodded. Then he knew she wasn't. He saw the look of pain that was showing now the adrenaline was wearing off.

"What hurts?" he asked, afraid of the answer.

"Just my hands, and my finger." She looked down at the finger and knew it was broken. That was nothing compared to Mark's injuries and she felt guilty even mentioning it.

"What else?" he knew that look and that it was more than a finger.

"My back," she managed to say in spite of the tears.

"How about your head?" He was most afraid of this. The doctors had warned her that another head injury might be fatal. She put her hand up to her head. The helmet was gone; she hadn't realized she had taken it off. She saw the helmet lying next to the bike and it had scrapes on the side of it. Only now was she thankful he made her wear it.

"I don't think I hit my head at all. I think my back is just locked is all. How about you?"

He turned his head away from her. That was something he only did when he wanted to protect her from the truth. Instantly she picked up on this and became even more concerned.

"Tell the truth remember? Be honest with yourself and everyone else," she said quoting his favorite saying. He slowly looked back at her. The truth was something he didn't want to offer right now because he didn't want to face it himself.

"I'm getting pretty dizzy. My left arm is messed up. I'm seeing two of you," he said matter-of-factly.

"What else," she asked, feeling her stomach turn over with worry.

After a long minute she finally heard the phrase that would haunt her. "I can barely feel my legs now," he said, closing his eyes.

Angel sat next to him. He had passed out again. At the same time she also noticed that he was starting to shiver a bit from the cold. She sat there for a long time not knowing what to do. They were miles from the nearest house and she had no way to contact anyone. Suddenly she remembered his phone. Looking over at him she decided it was the best time to see how things looked underneath him. He wouldn't feel any pain. She had to check his pockets for a phone.

Slowly she put her hand on the side of his neck, supporting it. The worst damage was on his left leg so she decided to check on that side. Putting her hand under his shoulder she tried lifting and rolling him as best she could. After two attempts she knew that a few inches was the best she could do. One more time she took a deep breath and rolled him onto his side as much as she could. She put her head to the ground and saw the back of his leather jacket was shredded. She could see parts of his shirt poking out of the holes and the grass had some red on it.

There was nothing she could do about that. He couldn't sit up to check it and she didn't have the strength to lift him up. She slowly lowered him down on his back. She reached her hand under him and felt nothing but his wallet in his back pocket. Putting her hand in the front pocket she found a handkerchief and some change. The other side yielded his phone and a small pocketknife. Praying to herself, she pulled it out but felt panicked as she could feel it falling apart much like hers did. It had been in his left pocket so it had been crushed under him. Loudly she swore to herself.

She sighed and sat trying to collect her thoughts, letting her head rest on her bent knees. Mark needed treatment as soon as possible, but it didn't look like that was going to happen for some time unless she could contact someone. It was up to her for now, and even that was useless because she didn't have anything to treat his wounds. Looking at the handkerchief she wondered what she should do. She thought of the sweater she was wearing under her coat. It was all she had. She undid her coat and removed it, before ripping off the cardigan sweater she was wearing. The small pocketknife Mark had been carrying would at least come in useful, she thought, picking it up and starting to cut the sleeves off. Taking the handkerchief she found the worst cut on his leg and put it on it. She tied the sweater arm over it to secure it in place as a makeshift bandage. She spent the next half hour ripping apart the sweater and using the pieces as best she could. It wasn't perfect, but it was better than nothing.

Inside she was filling with incredible guilt. She'd begged him to go faster. Maybe she didn't lean with him when he lost control and she threw the weight off. He wanted her to go on this ride just to take her mind off Adam. The thought both made her warm with feeling and sick from the same feeling. He had a few bikes already. He probably didn't need another one.

She looked around again and saw nothing she could use to cover him that would be of any use. She could hear him moaning again. Crawling across the ground, she got closer and took his hand. It was ice cold.

Thankfully the bleeding of his head had stopped. She tried saying his name softly until he opened his eyes again.

"Welcome back," she said softly.

He gave her a look of confusion. His eyes scanned around and over her trying to figure out where he was. She saw no pain in his face anymore. She could feel his hand shaking along with the rest of him.

"What happened?" he whispered and the sound made her want to cry.

"You were in an accident," she said plainly.

Memories came flooding back and he got more agitated. "Are you ok?" he asked trying to lift himself up.  
"I'm fine. I'm doing better than you are," she tried to smile.

She noticed a strange look on his face.

"My legs are gone aren't they? I don't feel them." Tears were smarting in his eyes.

"Calm down. They are still there. Can you try to move them a little?" She looked down and waited. Nothing.

"Oh God," he said to himself as he closed his eyes again.

She started crying herself. "I'm sorry Mark," she managed to say.

"Sorry for what?"

"This is my fault," she said, her voice barely over a whisper.

"No. It was an accident. If it was anyone's fault it was mine." He reached and held up his hand. Sobbing she grabbed it. Hearing him say that hurt worse than anything so far. Feeling herself lose control she let go of his hand and started walking away. He knew the thoughts that were running through her mind. Ever since Matt, she had the feeling that she did something wrong to deserve it or any bad thing that had happened was her fault in some way. Doctors had told him that was common to anyone who suffered abuse. And that was all she had ever known before they met.

"Come back here," he demanded, trying to sound stern. She continued to walk blindly. Heading to the trees she had found earlier she could hear his cries for her to return but she was heading to a blackness that shut everything else out. Slowly she was losing the control she had managed to hold since this happened. Everyone thought she was strong but inside she knew it was a cover. She only wanted a few minutes alone to get back together. Inside she was wishing for a drink or anything that would make this whole thing seem like a fantasy. Reaching into her pocket again she found her cigarettes and matches. With shaking hands she lit one and kept pacing, making sure he could still see her and know he wasn't alone.

After a few minutes of uncontrollable sobbing she stamped out the cigarette and slowly walked back. He watched her get closer and then turned his head away. She sat down next to him and grabbed his hand again.

"I'm sorry for leaving," she mumbled. Now she felt guilt over leaving him alone when he was calling for her. The only feeling she had right now was guilt in every way imaginable. He turned his head back to her.

"This wasn't your fault. No matter how you try to say it is. We are in this together. Don't leave again until I can get up and give you a swift kick in your ass." He saw a slight smile cross her face and she nodded.

"What time is it?" he asked. She looked at him oddly. Looking down at her watch she was amazed. With everything else that had gone wrong and had broken her stupid watch still worked.

"Its almost 6 o'clock" He could hear the shakiness in her voice.

"Calm down. We were supposed to be at the arena soon. When we don't show up they will come looking. Is your phone still working?" She shook her head.

"Both of them are broken. I have to go and find help." She felt a sudden squeeze of her hand that was stronger than any so far.

"Stay here. Its miles to the nearest house and you are probably hurt worse than you think. And you may not make it that far." He thought of how she would still lose her balance and footing when she got tired.

"I have to do something!" she yelled.

"You have done something. The best bet is to wait here. The salesman expected us back a while ago and Vince will be looking and calling. Sara will be calling. I mean it. Stay here." She shook her head and he saw the look of defiance crossing her features. He had to try a different approach before her stubborn streak kicked in.

"Don't leave me. I need your help," he said as gently as he could. He saw tears dripping down on her coat and he reached up as best he could to wipe them. She could see him visibly shaking now.

"Promise me you will stay here" he looked her in the eyes until he got a nod.

"I am never coming back to New York again. I am never going anywhere cold again," she said, trying to find some way to joke and alleviate the emotions.

"That takes care of half the country," he said quickly. "Have any cars gone by?"

"Not one the whole time. This is back road hell in this part of New York," she said angrily.

"Parts of Texas are like that too," he said with a chuckle.

Two hours later Vince was fuming with anger. He had called the hotel and learned they weren't there. Quickly he had to fill their match and pray the fans wouldn't riot. After arguing with the hotel he slammed the phone down and saw Rey passing by his makeshift office at the arena.  
"Hey Rey!" he yelled. Rey turned back around and came back in the office.  
"What's up boss?"

"I need you to do me a favor. Did you bring your gear with you?" he asked hopefully.

"Sure but I thought I was only doing promos and interviews."

"Mark and Angel aren't here yet. I have a few calls to make but I need a filler for their match just in case. Will you fight with Kane?" He knew the fans would love to see that after what Kane had supposedly done to Angel when the Matt situation was happening.

"I can but it is going to look like David and Goliath," he said almost comically.

"That's all right. But David will win this one. Go find Glenn and go over things. Use different high spots so we can use the plan on their angle. I owe you a big one." Vince shot his best promoter smile. Rey nodded and left to find his Goliath. Vince picked up the phone again.

Sara had been trying all afternoon to reach the hotel room. After giving up in frustration she pulled out her small phone book and started calling to see if she could reach Vince. Maybe he knew what was going on.

Rey and Kane walked into the office and could hear Vince yelling in the hallway before they even got there.  
"What time did they leave?" Pause. "Do you know where they were going?" Pause. "Are their things still in their room?" Pause. "Give me the number of the dealership please." Hanging up the phone he noticed the two standing before him. It did look rather silly. Rey was a good 2 feet shorter than Kane and they made an odd couple.

"Did you find them yet?" Rey asked with his mask in hand.

"They left this morning to try out a motorcycle at a dealership. Mark left the keys to his rental car with him and left to test drive it and Angel was with him. They should have been gone an hour and that was hours ago. He called the police but Mark didn't tell him where they were going, although they are looking. The dealer mentioned something about black ice in the area from rain. The police are looking but night is coming on" All three of them knew what he was talking about as all of the guys had driven in that area before. Ice you didn't know you were on until you were already skidding. He told them to get ready for the match and picked up the phone again.

Angel kept trying to talk to Mark and keep him aware and awake. His answers were starting to slur and he would lose concentration for a few seconds between them. She tried to bring up as many topics as she could think of; from who trained him to some of the people he had wrestled. His shaking was getting worse. The sky had begun to turn a shade of blue in the distance. Night was coming on quickly and it would get colder.

She kept talking to him until she noticed that he didn't answer her again. She never noticed that she was starting to shake almost as much as he was. Leaning over she touched him on the chest and felt it rise and fall. She had to think of a way to get him warm.

Her hands were getting cold and she put them in her pockets. She felt her pack of cigarettes and the book of matches. Damn! Why didn't she think of that sooner? She got up and started for the trees in the shadows. She brought back as many branches as she could carry and went back for more. Some of them were damp but most were dry being sheltered under the leaves that were still on the trees and the ground.

She remembered the gasoline nearby. They were a few feet away but she went on his other side to be sure. Piling the small branches, she struck one of the matches and prayed. It didn't light the branch. Holding it until it burnt her fingers she struck another. Still nothing. She thought about the pocketknife and pulled it out. Cutting a piece of her shirt she wrapped it around a stick and lit the matches again. This time it started to burn and after a few minutes of staring she saw it was beginning to light the other pieces. It was a small fire but it would offer some warmth.


	3. Chapter 3

Long Road Back Part 3 

Sara sat by the phone and waited. It seemed like the longest wait in her life. There had been many times she waited for the phone call from Mark after a bad match but this was much worse. Finally the phone rang. She picked it up and practically screamed the greeting.

"Sara," Vince said with his low voice.

"Have you heard from Mark? He didn't call me tonight. Adam hasn't heard from Angel either," she asked praying he would tell her they just didn't have time.

"No. According to the hotel they went to a dealership to test a new motorcycle. They didn't come back." He waited and heard nothing. "The police are looking but it's dark now in New York. I called the dealership and the salesman mentioned some weather problems. They are probably fine. I will call you when I hear anything."

"I am flying there now. I was going to tell Mark I was leaving early anyway," she said, her voice quivering.

"I'm sure they're fine Sara, they probably broke down somewhere," Vince said trying to find something to say.

"If they are it will be a surprise. I will be on the next flight. Can you have someone pick me up at the airport?"

"I will call ahead and order a Lear for you, the boys are going out after the matches. Some of them know the area a bit. The whole group was scheduled off and they want to help out."

Sara almost choked with emotion. Time off was precious and they were spending it trying to help her husband and best friend that she held dear.

Angel kept feeding small branches into the fire until it had grown. She checked on Mark often. He was still out. With the little light that the fire offered she tried to recheck the bleeding of his wounds. Most of them had stopped, but when she touched the part of his leg that she knew was broken he still didn't move or make a sound. She wanted to make splints but doubted she had enough material on her coat to wrap his long legs.

Sitting there in the cold darkness her thoughts were starting to betray her again. She felt for her necklace and was happy she found it was still there. She held the small angel in her hand and prayed the meaning that Sara had given to it would come true, because right now she didn't think she could do this.

Thinking back she remembered how his face looked when she woke up and heard of what he did to Matt. She remembered all the times that they were there for her. It seemed bad things always happened to people she loved. Her mother had died a slow and painful death. Matt had almost tried to kill Mark. Now, because he had been thinking of her well-being and comfort, she was watching him lie on the ground freezing, and possibly paralyzed. What if something ever happened to Adam? How could she live without him now that he had completed her?

What if the roles had been reversed and she was telling Adam to go faster? He wasn't as experienced as Mark.

How could she look Sara in the face and offer a simple apology to her now crippled husband? How could she look Adam in the face and tell him that she asked him to go faster and not think of how the roads would be in the cold conditions? What if she didn't do the right thing when he lost control? How could she explain to Sara that she had left him alone when he was calling her back? The one thought that kept creeping back was bad things kept happening to the people she loved.

She reached over and felt his hand. It was warmer now but his chest and legs were still cold. Grabbing more wood she put a few more sticks in. She had nothing more to cover him with than her coat, so she took it off and laid it over Marks chest. The chill almost took her breath away. This was one of those rare times she was glad she grew up in the freezing climate that she did. You can learn to block out the cold if you try hard enough. Hearing another groan she went again to try to coax him back.

He opened his eyes again and she immediately told him to squeeze her hand. After a long while she felt a squeeze.

"Feeling better?" she asked hopefully.

He nodded slightly. "Sara?" he said weakly. She felt tears coming again.

"She isn't here. Just me, you lucky guy." She laughed but saw no response.

He felt something on him and saw her coat over him. He looked over and saw her in her shirt and tried to take it off.

"No," he mumbled as he tried to lift it off. She grabbed his hand and put it back under the material.

"I'm close to the fire. I will be ok. You need it." He looked at the fire questioningly and back to her.

"Be glad I brought my cigarettes. This is one time they may save a life." She meant it as a joke but didn't realize how distasteful it was until after it came out of her mouth. He shook his head at her and tried again to lift off the coat.

"Leave it there damn it!" she said forcefully and again put his hand under it. He didn't have the strength to try again.

"Where do you hurt?" she asked wondering if he was in any pain at all. He thought for a moment and tried to move his arms and legs and head, registering the pains he felt in various places.

"My head and my arm," he said barely above a whisper. "Are my legs there?" he asked again. Once again she felt pain shoot through her like a bullet.

"Yes they are. It will be dawn in a few hours. I will go looking for help," she said softly.

"No. Don't leave. Stay here," he said growing more agitated.

"I will as long as I can but you need help. This is a service road. There won't be any traffic. If I can get back to the main road a few miles back someone has to come by."

He was still shaking his head when she saw his eyes close again.

Suddenly feeling tired she lay down next to him, trying to get as close to the fire as she could stand. Before she knew it she was asleep.

She felt her eyes opening and she saw the fire had gone out. Looking over at Mark she saw his face was almost pure white and his lips were blue. With a shaking hand she felt his neck. She felt nothing. She put her head on his chest. She heard nothing. Feeling a loss she had only felt once before in her life she started screaming.

Jumping awake, Angel opened her eyes, trying to shake off the nightmare. The sun was just beginning to rise and she could see a sliver of orange over the horizon. The fire was still going. She looked at Mark and his eyes were closed. She felt for a pulse on his cold neck. Exhaling with relief when she found one, she piled more branches on the fire. Resigning herself for what she had to do she felt under her coat and felt a little warmth on his chest. After piling the rest of the branches on the fire, she looked briefly at her watch.

"Mark, I am going for help. I swear to God I will be back one way or another. I am not leaving you like before. I will be back." She placed her hand on his chest and made a silent prayer. He never moved or made a sound. She took one more look and turned away, starting for the road.

All the boys were on the road. All of them in their rental cars with maps in hand. All had their cell phones with police and Vince's number. In pairs they spread out, each taking different directions. They were all going to try the main roads and then the back roads. They all had flashlights that had been brought to them when Vince ordered them from a local store. Now that the sun was coming up it was easier to see.

Rey and Kane manned one car. Edge and Lita had another and so on. Some passed each other on the same highway and became frustrated at the lack of coordination on their part and never noticed one police car.

Angel kept walking. Several times she had tripped and landed on her knees when her balance was off. Every time she would stop to rest she would see Mark in her mind and she picked herself up and kept going. After what seemed like hours of walking she fell again. This time it took longer to get up. Her back was throbbing in pain and her hands were beyond pain as she kept falling on them and pushing herself up with them. The blisters from the burns had long since broken open and she saw small flaps of skin beginning to hang off. Strangely she didn't notice it very much.

She finally made it to the main road and tried to remember which way they had turned from here. Left or right held the same endless nothingness that she had just left. She chose the right as left seemed to be bad luck the day before. She could feel herself stumbling and continued on. There was nothing else to focus on but finding a house or a car or someone. She felt herself trip once more and landed again on her knees. She sat down for a rest this time. Her eyes were directed on the road ahead. Trying again and again to get up and finding she couldn't, she grew more frustrated.

Rey and Kane turned down yet another unnamed road. How anyone kept things straight was a miracle.

"Why would anyone want to live out here?" Rey asked in disbelief

"Some people like the solitude," Kane offered.

"This is a good example of why you need to live near other people," Rey said back with distaste in his mouth.

They were about to turn around and try another road, but something kept him on this one. After miles of nothing Kane spotted something way off in the distance, something that didn't match the endless landscape of trees and hills.

"What is that?" Kane heard himself say aloud stepping on the gas.

Rey spotted the tiny thing Kane saw.  
"Probably another animal," Rey added.

Getting closer they saw it wasn't an animal. It was a person. The closer they got, it became a more familiar person.

"Not again," Rey said, throwing the door open before the car was stopped. He ran over to Angel who was sitting on the side of the road and not looking up in any way. She had no coat on despite how chilly the morning was.

Getting down on his knees and holding her arms he tried to get her to look at him. Her face was white and her lips were light blue. He could feel her arms were ice cold. Rey took his coat off and wrapped it around her shoulders.  
"Are you ok?" he asked her, very concerned. She didn't say anything. He noticed the blood stains on her knees and she was holding her hands on her lap with the palms up. Gasping as he saw her hands he yelled for Kane who he could hear was already on the phone.

"Hey, are you ok?" he said louder. She slowly looked up at him.

"Help is on the way. Where is Mark?" Kane asked while trying to get down to her level.

"There was an accident. He is hurt very bad. I couldn't go anymore," she said in a very monotone way.

"Where? We have been all over here. You have to show us where," Rey said helping her up.

"He can't feel his legs. I promised him I wouldn't leave him but I had to. If he wakes up, he'll think I lied...that I deserted him," she said, showing no emotion despite the words as she walked slowly to the car. Rey shot a very serious look at Kane who had the same look on his face. They helped her to the car and she told them where to go.

They had gone about 5 miles when they saw the silver of the bike near the tree. They both ran out of the car toward Mark. His eyes were still closed and he didn't respond at all when they tried to talk to him.

"He looks pretty bad, but he is still alive," Kane said feeling his neck and putting his hand to his chest. He grabbed his phone again and gave specific directions on how to get there.

Rey tried looking under the makeshift bandages that she had made. He took note that her coat was covering him.

"He's a mess," he said not realizing she was standing behind them.

"His leg is broken, his head was bleeding" Angel said in a disconnected way.

"Sit down, the ambulance and police will be here in a minute," Rey said helping her down. Already, another car pulled up and it was Lita and Edge. Soon another car pulled up. They heard sirens in the distance finally, cursing to themselves that it took them so long to finally come and they weren't even the ones who found them.

She leaned over to Mark and put her head on his shoulder.

"I told you I would be back," she whispered.

One ambulance and one police car pulled over to the side of the road. Everything from that point seemed to be blurry to Angel. She saw them put a collar on his neck. She watched them put him on a backboard. She watched them splint his legs and arm. Yet it all seemed like a dream. She sat there quietly next to Rey until they tried to help her. One EMT reached out to check her hands and she jumped back defensively. Rey hadn't seen her do that since Matt was around. She grabbed onto Rey with a strength he didn't think was possible in her condition. After a lot of coaxing they got her to let them wrap her hands and help her into the ambulance. She lay down on the side while watching them work on Mark.

Now she knew the helpless feeling he described to her when he rode to the hospital. Now she understood the hell she put them through. She thought she had put those demons to bed but they were flooding back. She felt a pricking sensation on her arm but said nothing. In fact, she felt nothing all the way to the hospital.

Sara got off the plane and was greeted by one of Vince's assistants. They led her to a sedan and she got in. All they could tell her was they were taking her to the hospital. They didn't know anymore than that. She asked where Vince was and why didn't he call her. All they would do was repeat they didn't know anything and Vince was already there. All she could do was worry until she got there.

When she saw him she instinctively knew it wasn't going to be good news. If it were he would have just sent anyone. Slowly she walked toward him.

"What is it?" she said bluntly.

The look Vince had was the same look he had outside the ICU when Angel was brought in. He stood staring at his shoes hoping the words would be there. All Sara could think was some things never change.

"There was an accident. The bike skidded on ice and he was hurt," he said in a low quiet voice.

"How bad is he?" she said plainly.

"He has the best care, I made sure the best people are here"

"How bad is he? What is wrong with him?" she found herself yelling.

"The bike apparently skidded and he was dragged for a bit. His leg is broken. His other leg is pretty torn. He has a broken arm and a concussion. His back and shoulder are pretty torn too. He also has hypothermia despite what Angel tried to do." he looked her in the eye for the first time.

"What do you mean despite what she tried to do? How is she?" she yelled again, aware she was verging on hysteria but unable to stop herself.  
"Apparently she had a helmet on and was thrown off. She had no head injuries, which is a miracle. She has a broken finger and second degree burns on her hands. She has lacerations of her knees. She had hypothermia. Both are dehydrated. She is exhausted. Her back is hurt but they don't think it is any worse than it was before. From what we can gather, she got the bike off him somehow, and helped him move away from the bike to get him flat and she bandaged him up as best she could. She cut up her sweater and shirt to do it, built a fire and went for help. She left her coat on him and walked in 30-degree weather for 5 miles until Rey and Kane found her." Sara felt tears rolling down her eyes. She could tell by the way he was acting there was more.

"What aren't you telling me?" she asked waiting for the next blow.

Vince took a deep breath and took her hand which almost made her lose it right there.  
"She said he couldn't feel his legs. He lost feeling in them shortly after the accident. He was between the bike and a tree." She heard herself scream and saw several familiar faces turn the corner. Vince shook his head and they went back.

Sara waited to compose herself again.

"Where is he?"

"He is still in with the doctors. Angel is in a room. We can't get hold of Adam yet. Do you want to see her until you can see Mark?" Rey turned the corner. He stopped cold when he saw her. His face said to her that he had seen Mark for himself.

"Rey and Kane found her," Vince offered.

"Not again," she heard herself say and was enveloped by his arms. "You are our guardian angel."

He have her a squeeze and walked away. Clearly he didn't want to offer any details of what he saw.

Vince led her to Angel's room. She slowly walked in. Angel was asleep. Once again, she looked tiny in that bed. Her hands were wrapped in bandages and she could see the bulk of bandages on her knees under the blanket.

"We don't know what happened but Rey said she was acting strange when they found her. He said it reminded him of the way she was when she was with Matt. She pulled away from the EMT's and was very withdrawn. Rey was the only one she would talk to." With that Vince left. His duty was done. He went back to the hotel to wait for any word.

Sara sat down and just looked at her. She didn't look as bad as the last time she was here. She looked almost peaceful. Sara looked up and saw the IV that was again next to her. There was an oxygen mask on her pale face. She wanted to take her hand but couldn't.

Sara had sat there for about 10 minutes in silence when she heard the door open.

"Mrs. Calaway?" a young doctor appeared in the doorway. She rose up to talk to him but dreaded every step.

"How is my husband?" she could feel herself trembling but couldn't stop it.

"He is stable. He has a concussion. He needed a few stitches in his head. His arm is broken, as well as his leg. He has many lacerations of his back, legs and arm. Some had to have pieces of gravel and dirt removed which is why we took so long. Right now there is no sign of infection, he has hypothermia but not as bad as your friend," he said very gently.

"I was told he couldn't feel his legs."

The doctor looked at her and tried to find the right words.

"His back hit the tree. I don't think he was going very fast when he hit it. There is some compression of his spinal cord, which right now is causing paralysis. There aren't any obvious fractures to his vertebrae and the cord is not severed or injured. It is just swollen from the impact. There is every possibility it will go down and there won't be any long term effects."

"If it doesn't?" she knew he was trying to make everything sound optimistic.

"I think it will. There are no guarantees of course when the back and spinal cord are involved but he is healthy, and strong. I have seen this happen before and the patient has walked out. There may be a long rehab but it is entirely possible he will walk after all this. Frankly, I am surprised he made it this far and is in better condition than others I have seen in a similar accident. Your friend did all the right things, although she won't believe it. She kept saying I shouldn't have moved him, and I left him." He tried to smile and stay upbeat. She appreciated his honesty and bedside manner.

"How is she? My husband and I are proxy for her, along with her husband." He opened his chart and saw her name on the forms that Vince had faxed to them.

"She will be fine. Only God knows how she got that bike off him. Her hands needed some work. It looks like she did more damage to them than from the burns. The gravel in the burns and in her knees indicates that she stumbled quite a few times. Her finger is splinted under the bandages. I got her old charts and at her stage of recovery I am surprised she was able to walk that far. Sometimes any lasting effects of an injury like hers would and could be affected by stress, and tiredness. She was very hypothermic. She tried to refuse medical help but obviously was in no condition to make that decision. Mental confusion accompanies severe hypothermia. She tried to leave and I had to 'intervene'. She is sedated right now, which she needs. The more we tried to help her the more combative she got. I am a bit concerned about her mental status. She was crying a lot and kept saying it was her fault."

"She hates hospitals." Sara dabbed her eyes with a Kleenex.

"She apparently hates doctors too. I have never heard some of those words before. I understand her husband hasn't been notified yet?" Sara shook her head.

"When she wakes up we will give her some pain medication for her back. There is considerable muscle strain and two of her discs show herniation from a previous injury. But no further damage. She has some road rash on her leg but not too bad. I think when they tipped she hit the ground and was basically pushed or thrown off. His legs were longer and didn't have time to get out of the way before getting caught or he might have been luckier. It is a miracle she has no further head trauma."

"She had a drug problem a little less than a year and a half ago. She was addicted to Soma, and a few painkillers." Sara didn't know how they would be able to give her anything without it starting problems again.

The doctor looked down and sighed.

"There are a few things we could try but we will have to keep it on a very limited basis and just the very minimums. Her tolerance for pain must have increased. She had to have been in severe pain since the fall. I can take you to see your husband now" she took a deep breath and followed him out the door.

Sara followed him down the hall and into the room. She looked at the floor the whole way. Even when they got into the room she didn't look up until she was mentally ready. With a deep breath she looked up and opened her eyes. The sight of Mark almost made her scream, but she made no sound.

Starting from the top she looked over every part she could see. His head was bandaged. He had several IV's and was hooked up to a heart monitor. His arm was in a cast. Every part of his chest around to his back was bandaged. With all the bandages on his legs he looked more like a mummy. His long leg was in a cast to his knee. On his face was an oxygen mask. She felt tears rolling down her cheeks. She slowly walked to him and wanted to hold his hand but even the other hand had bandages on it.

"The oxygen is heated to help bring his temperature up, so are the fluids. He started to come around when we were working on him and he asked for you." The doctor added and quietly walked out the door. Sara felt the tears streaming down her cheeks now.

Sara sat there for hours watching him. She watched his chest rise and fall. Now and then she saw a slight frown. After an eternity she heard him moan slightly. Instantly she was on her feet and standing over him. She kept repeating his name until he opened his eyes.

His eyes had a look of confusion and pain. Sara kept talking to him until she saw recognition on his face. She bent down and tried to hug him in some way without hurting him.

"I love you," she whispered in his ear. She saw his hand slowly reach up to the mask and tried to pull it off. She grabbed it for him and pulled it down.

"I love you," he whispered back. Sara dropped her head to his chest and started sobbing. She felt his hand on the back of her head. After a minute she sat down on the chair next to him.

"Angel?" he whispered.

"She is going to be fine. She is in a room down the hall" Sara didn't want to give too much information because she knew if she told him everything he would get upset. She reached up and put the mask back on. After a few minutes he fell asleep again.


	4. Chapter 4

Long Road Back Part 4

Sara spent much of the day and night going between both rooms. Neither showed any movement or awareness. On her last visit to Angel's room she noticed a small turn of her head. She stood up and tried talking to her. Angel finally opened her eyes and Sara noticed the pained look on her face. She pushed the nurses call button.

After a minute or so recognition crossed Angel's face. Sara noticed tears beginning to form. Like Mark she saw her hand come up to remove the mask but couldn't because of her bandaged hands that looked more like mitts. Sara pulled the mask away.

"Mark?" she whispered.

"He's ok. He talked to me a while ago." Sara said stroking her hair.

"His legs?" Sara could barely hear her and didn't want to tell her the truth.

"You did everything right. You probably saved his life" She tried to say gently.

Angel shook her head and turned away. This was the moment she was afraid of more than anything.

"I'm sorry," she muttered, still looking away. "I shouldn't have moved him," she cursed to herself.

"It was an accident. It could have happened to anyone. It wasn't your fault." Angel still couldn't look at her.

"Where is Adam?"

"Vince got hold of him an hour ago. He is on the first flight out this morning. He will be here soon." She added hoping it would help.

A nurse walked in and checked her vital signs and made notes on her chart. She pulled out a needle and put it in the IV port.

"What is that?" Angel asked.

"Don't worry, its something for the pain." The nurse said.

"No, I don't want anything" she practically yelled.

"The doctor ordered it for when you wake up. It will help." She said very condescendingly and then patted her arm and walked away with a smile.

Sara asked her what happened. She tried to remember what she could. Halfway during her conversation her words slurred and Sara noticed a glaze of her eyes. She thought briefly that it was strange, but assumed it was tiredness. After another minute Angel closed her eyes and fell asleep. Sara put the mask back on and turned to take the long walk down the hall again.

When she got there she noticed the doctor was in the room.

"How is he?" she asked worriedly.

"He is sleeping. We are giving him something for the pain. He is doing well. When he wakes up push the button and we will see how his legs are." He smiled and gave her arm a squeeze and walked out the door.

Sara sat down in the chair next to him and fell asleep. It was a restless sleep in which she could hear every noise in the room and hallway. Somewhere in the back of her mind she heard his voice.

"Sara" he whispered.

Instantly she was up and at his side. She pushed the button.

"How do you feel?" she smiled at him. He rolled his eyes at the joke.

"How do I look?" he said just as sarcastically.

"Handsome as ever" she shot back.

She reached down and kissed him and he kissed her back.

"How is Angel?" he asked again. She wondered to herself if he was ready for the truth but she knew that was what he always wanted.

"She has a broken finger, and she was hypothermic." She said hoping it would be enough.

"What else?" he asked knowing there was more just by the look on her face.

"What do you remember?" she asked him.

"Not much. I remember hitting some ice but I never saw it. I lost it. No matter what I did I couldn't get the bike back. I think I remember a fire but I could have been dreaming." He closed his eyes hoping for more memories but there were none. He shook his head.

Sara felt a tear rolling down her cheek. He reached up and brushed it away with his bandage.

"What?" he asked growing concerned.

"Somehow she got the bike off you and…"

"How?" he asked instantly getting upset.

"We don't know. She got the bike off and apparently burned her hands doing it. She strained her back pretty good. She found your knife I gave you for Christmas and she cut up her sweater and shirt for bandages. She built a fire and went for help. Rey and Kane found her on the side of the road 5 miles from you. Her knees are torn up from falling on them and her hands were a mess because she kept landing on them with the burns. She put her coat on you and went for help. She had bad hypothermia and they had to sedate her when they got her here. Physically she should be fine." He saw there was more. Sara was her best friend and could see the pain on her face.

"What else?" he was afraid to ask.

"She is blaming herself for it. She won't listen. She wouldn't even look at me. She thinks she made you worse by moving you."

"It wasn't her fault. I didn't see the ice. She put her coat on me? How could I let her do that?" he asked with a tear in his eye. He started to tremble and put his elbows down to try and lift himself up. Sara reached and lightly pushed him back down.

"Calm down. You are starting to sound like her. I doubt you had a choice in the matter." Sara tried to smile.

"Where is Adam?" he asked still trying to get up.

"He is on his way," she added quickly. "You need to calm down. She is fine right now."

"Right now" he said quickly.

The doctor walked in.

"How are you Mr. Calaway?" he asked noting the tension in the room right then.

"Pretty sore" he admitted.

"I would imagine." He said pulling the sheet back and exposing his feet. "I just want to test something out. Close your eyes and let me know if you feel this."

Mark closed his eyes. The doctor pulled out a pin and pushed it on his leg. He looked at Marks face for a response. There was none. He pushed it slightly on the other foot where the cast didn't cover and tried there.

"Did you feel that?" he asked.

"No." Mark said with his eyes still closed. The doctor tried further up his better leg. Mark had a slight frown cross his features.

"Did you feel that?" he asked.

"I'm not sure. I didn't feel any pain," he said opening his eyes.

"We will check again later. It may take a while. I will order something for the pain and I will be back later." He turned to walk away.

"Nothing for pain doc. I am ok right now. I will call when I need it." Mark looked at him menacingly.

"Is your friend as stubborn?" he asked Sara with a smile.

"Worse!" she said right away.

The doctor left and they were alone. There wasn't much to say. He kept trying to remember anything he could but what there was seemed more like a dream than anything else. Slowly small pieces came back but nothing that filled in the picture.

"I can't believe she is blaming herself for this" he said sadly.

"Since Matt she blames herself for everything. Adam is usually the only one who can help when she gets like that. We just have to hold her together until he shows up," she said hoping it would help.

"I want to see her," he said seriously.

"You cant right now. Maybe later they will let her come in. I will ask the doctor when he comes back." Sara noticed his eyes were closing again. His face looked very tired.

"Go to sleep and I will check on her. I will be back" he nodded and the tension left his face; he was asleep before she left the room.

Again, Sara made the long trip down the hall. She walked in and saw Angel staring toward the window. Sara sat down. She reached into her purse and pulled out her necklace that they had taken off when she got there. Angel looked at her in a sad way.

She put her hand out to offer it but she didn't take it.

"I don't deserve it Sara," she said shaking her head.

"This is stupid. You are being selfish. Not everything is about you. Not everything happens because of you. I never told Mark about our conversations. Your parents blamed you for everything but they were wrong. They made their own choices and decisions. So did your brothers. You have to let it go sometime. Not everything is your fault. Things happen, sometimes God tests us." Sara reached over and hung it on her neck closing the clasp. Angel reached for it as she did in nervousness but only got frustrated because her hands were so bandaged she couldn't feel it.

"He tested me and I failed again," she said with tears rolling down her face.  
"Would you stop it? You are acting like a kid again. You had to move him. You helped him and got him help. What more could you have done?" she said getting almost angry.

"He took me on that ride to get my mind off Adam. He didn't need another bike. I probably leaned the wrong way when it tipped" she brushed the tears from her face.

"He said he couldn't control the bike. It slipped on the ice. He couldn't stop it. There was nothing you could have done. And despite how you are trying to turn this on you he told me last month he was looking for another bike" Sara was trying not to get angry but was barely holding on to it.

"I want to see him," Angel said in a moment of calm. Sara thought it would be the best thing.

"I will ask the doctor when he comes back" she smiled and touched her arm. Angel started to jump away but Sara held on. Angel sat up despite the searing pain in her back. Sara grabbed her for a hug and could feel her shaking. All she could do was keep saying 'its ok'. She couldn't imagine how she felt in the middle of nowhere and helpless.

The nurse came in again with another needle. She gave a brief unconvincing smile and put the needle again into the IV port.

"I told you I don't want anything for pain." She said very annoyed.

"The doctor wants you to have it and since he had to forcefully take over your care in the emergency room I have to follow his orders until he releases you to make your own decisions. Then it will be up to you or your proxy." She pulled the needle out and walked away.

Sara watched her. Her upset features softened and her eyes glazed again. After a minute she was falling asleep.

"Sara" she said slurring badly.

"What honey?" Sara said stroking her hair like she did whenever she felt her motherly instinct take over.

"Adam" she looked confused.

"He is on his way. Japan is a long plane ride. He will be here." She said smiling. Looking at Angel she saw this wasn't a minimum of a painkiller. Something was wrong. Suddenly she recognized the difference and got angry.

"I will be back when you wake up." She added, kissing her forehead and noticed Angel was already asleep.

Sara walked out the door and went to the nurse's station. She spotted the nurse who gave her the shot.  
"What was that you gave her?" she said very demanding.

"I can't discuss her case with you. Those are the rules." She said smugly.

"I am one of her proxies. I want to know what you have been giving her," Sara yelled. The nurse called for the doctor. After a few minutes he walked up to the desk with a worried look on his face.  
"What is it?" he looked to the nurse to offer some explanation.

"She wants me to discuss the medication I have been giving your patient and I am not aware of her alleged proxy," she said with the coldness of a woman toughened to seeing patients as a bed number and not a person.  
"She is a proxy and has full access to her records" he said grabbing her chart. He opened it up and started reading.

"What the hell is this?" he yelled to the nurse.

"I gave what you prescribed doctor," she said innocently.  
"I wrote on her chart that nothing narcotic was to be given!" he started yelling.

The nurse had a look of confusion on her face. She reached for the chart and he took it. She reread what was on it.

"Doctor, it says right here, patient is to get the shot every 4 hours for pain" she handed him the chart back. He grabbed it and looked again. Flipping the page he looked at her in disgust.

"Did you bother to turn the page? This patient has a history of drug problems. I originally wrote for this but added a revision on the back when I found out more of her history." His face turned a dark red.  
The nurse took the chart back and her demeanor changed immediately.

Not being able to stand not being included any longer Sara finally stepped in.  
"What in the hell have you been giving her?" she said loudly.

"Morphine" he said simply. I want to talk to you right now!" he said to the nurse who by this time had changed to a shade of white. Sara stood there shaking in anger. She could hear yelling behind a closed door. The nurse walked out with a tear stained face and all her uniform had no ID tags. She looked at Sara before walking away.

"I'm very sorry" she offered and walked away.

The doctor walked out and tried to think of something to say.  
"She has been suspended until we investigate. She has only had 4 shots so the damage should be minimal. There wouldn't be a physical dependency yet." He added hopefully.

"I am not worried about the physical dependency, she more mentally dependent than physically the first time. She is still upset that this is her fault." Sara shook her head to herself not believing this could happen.

"We will help her." He said seriously.

"She doesn't accept help often. She is very stubborn. I have only heard her ask for help once" Sara took a moment to calm down. "She wants to see Mark. If she could see him it might help"

The doctor looked at her for a long moment.  
"It might make matters worse. His appearance right now might shock her more. I would wait for more improvement so she sees that he is better."

"She saw him bloody and half alive on the ground and took care of him. She saw him torn open. How could seeing him in bandages be worse than that?" she spat at him venting her anger wherever she could.

The doctor thought a moment and nodded his head.  
"When she wakes up call me and we will take her. But I don't recommend this." He added.

"Her husband isn't here yet. She had no other real family. She has been through more than you could ever believe from childhood on. I think it would help," she added. The doctor nodded.

"I don't think we should tell Mark about this yet. I told him about her and he got upset. You don't want to see him mad doctor. Trust me." She said seriously.

"Between the two of them it will be a while. He finally asked for a pain shot while you were down here. He is asleep again. I doubt highly he will go through the next few days without the shots. Even for someone with a high threshold for pain. He will probably be in and out most of the time," he added shaking his head slightly.

"I think as long as she sees him alive it will help" she added. He finally nodded slightly and left. Sara took a deep breath and walked back into Angel's room. The stress of the last day was beginning to take its toll on her. Inside she kept praying for Adam to show up to help. If there were one thing that would really help it would be his influence. She just had to hold her together that long.


	5. Chapter 5

Long Road Back 5

(sorry for the delay in posting. Lots of personal and family issues happening right now. This is a short addition.More is coming)

Sara sat in the chair next to her and fell asleep again. After a long while she heard a slight squeaking noise. She opened her eyes and saw Angel trying to get up out of the bed and not having much success.   
"What in the hell are you doing?" she yelled while trying to stop her.

"I am leaving" she blurted out and kept trying.

"Like hell you are! Just lie down and calm down. Don't make me call the doctor in here to sedate you again" she added with seriousness to her voice that Angel had never heard before. After a few halfhearted attempts to continue she finally gave up and lay back down. Pain was crossing her face.

Sara reached for the call button and Angel tried to grab for it.

"No don't! I'm lying down. I don't want that bitch coming back in here," she added angrily.

Sara took a deep breath and tried to calm herself down.

"She won't be back. Why do you want to leave?" she noticed tears were streaming down Angel's face.

"I just want out. I want out of here. I want to go home. I want this to be over. I want to see Adam," she kept sobbing.

"He is coming. I promise you that. Running away wont make this instantly disappear. It happened, it's over, and you are going to have to deal with it," she said in a very stern tone.

"You didn't see him like that Sara, I did. I thank God you didn't see him" she finally made and effort to calm down when she saw how upset Sara was getting.

"You are so strong. You need to be strong a little while longer. You are one of the strongest people I know" Sara admitted. This statement started a new flood of tears.

"No I'm not Sara. I panicked. I cried most of the time. And then when he needed help most I…" she still could hear Marks voice yelling for her to come back. She turned from Sara.

"You what?" she asked wondering what could be so bad to get this kind of guilt. "Crying is natural. It is nothing to be ashamed of. It is a reaction to what is happening. Showing your feelings makes you a better person in that it shows you care," she added hoping it would alleviate some part of her guilt.

Angel kept shaking her head slightly. After a while she calmed down.

"I want to see Mark," she said softly.

"If you stay here and calm down I have already arranged for you to see him. But not if you stay upset like this. It won't do either of you any good" she saw a ray of hope on Angel's face.

"Can he feel his legs yet?" she asked hopefully. After a few seconds Sara shook her head no.

"They are pretty sure he will get better. There are no broken bones in his back. He probably slid into the tree at the end. There is some swelling of his spinal cord but nothing broke." She said with hope in her voice.

"Pretty sure" Angel repeated sarcastically.

"Are you calmed down now?" she asked trying to lighten the mood.

Angel nodded and wiped the remaining tears on her bandaged hands. Sara pushed the button and sat down waiting for the doctor to come in.

After a few minutes of talking Sara even managed to get her to smile. The doctor came in with a wheelchair. After some help they got her into the chair. The doctor came around in front of her and looked her right in the eyes.

"I just want to give you some idea of how he looks before you go in. He is asleep right now. He has a lot of bandages and a couple casts. He should look better than when you last saw him" he looked up at Sara who nodded slightly at him. Angel caught the glance and wondered why.

Together they pushed her down the hall. Angel kept her eyes on the floor until she felt the motion of the wheels slowly stopping. She looked up and saw him briefly through a window. She took a deep breath and felt Sara's hand grab her wrist, as she couldn't hold her hand.

The first thing she noticed was his red hair peeking out behind the bandages on his head. His left eye was bruised and she could see scabs on the area not covered by the bandages. She felt tears rolling down her face as she saw the bandages on his chest and covering his whole leg. She noticed the casts. She found herself staring at his legs willing them to move.

"Oh God" she heard herself say. She thought she had prepared herself for how he looked but now that he was in front of her she still pictured the places his skin was torn. She could almost see through the bandages at every cut and scrape. He looked even more helpless than he did out on that road. Even the thought that he had gotten help and was safe didn't help her at all.

She reached out to touch his hand that was covered in bandages much like her own but saw she couldn't and felt the tears flowing again.

"We just gave him another pain shot so he won't feel anything," the doctor added hoping she would try again to touch him.

The simple words, 'won't feel anything' coursed through her like a knife. Sara reached over and put his hand on top of her bandaged hand. She tried to grasp around it and felt the pain it caused in her hand but it didn't stop her from trying. She noticed a slight frown cross his features and she let go thinking the effort hurt him in some way.

"He felt you there" Sara added smiling. The smile wasn't returned.

After another minute or two she whispered, "I want to go back to my room." The doctor looked at Sara hoping her look would tell him if this was a good or bad experience but her face showed nothing.

They took her back to her room and with help she got back into bed. Sara said she would be back later and went back down the hall to be with Mark. After she left the doctor was finishing writing on her chart.   
"I want something for pain," she said plainly and blankly.

The doctor looked over his glasses at her and started to speak.

"I will give you something but it wont be what you have been having. Now that you are through the worst of it I am moving the medication down a bit" he said.

"I want whatever you were giving me before" she said with a hint of anger in her voice.

"I can't do that. I will give you something but it won't be as strong as what you have been given. I will send a nurse in" he patted her hand and walked out. Angel turned her head to the window and noticed it had started to rain.

After a couple hours Sara was still sleeping in her chair beside Mark. He was slowly waking up from the last shot. She heard him moving and tried to open her eyes.

"Morning sunshine" she heard him whisper.

"Feeling better?" she asked hopefully.

"A little" he said knowing it was a lie.

The doctor knocked on the door and walked in.

"Can I see you for a moment Mrs. Calaway?" she could tell by the look on her face it was not good. Sara looked down at Mark who also had a concerned look.  
"What's wrong?" he asked rising a bit.

"Nothing, I just want to ask her a question about the medical history of your friend" he said with a smile. Sara stood up and walked outside and closed the door behind her.

The doctor took a breath and finally began speaking.

"I just had to sedate Angel again. She asked for a pain shot after you left earlier and I told her it wouldn't be what she has been getting and she seemed angry with that. The nurse gave her the shot and after a while she went back to check. Apparently she ripped her IV out and was in the process of getting dressed. I don't know what happened but she was very agitated and started throwing things and swearing loudly. She took a few steps to the door and fell. Her knees are bleeding again and her hands. It took two orderlies to hold her while we sedated her. Her blood pressure was fairly high and I had no other choice. High blood pressure and previous brain injuries don't go well together. After checking her further I can hear a slight rattle in her lungs. She may be developing pneumonia," he added looking at her very seriously.

Sara could only shake her head to herself. What would be causing this kind of meltdown? What else happened out there that they hadn't told her?

Sara looked at him for answers. She didn't see any.

"I told you I didn't recommend this. I need to know right now what is emotionally wrong with her that isn't in the records. If you can't provide me with a reason I will have to take more drastic steps to keep her from harming herself" he said seriously.

"She has finally gotten her life together. She is happy. The rest should be in the past," she said quickly.

"She may be happy but it isn't in the past if she is reacting like this. What has happened to her to explain these outbursts?" he repeated.

Sara wasn't sure what to say.

"I promised her that what she has said to me would stay with me," she said bluntly.

"If you don't tell me her full emotional problems I will have to have her put in restraints. Besides, anything you say to me is protected by law." he threatened with a severity that gave her the chills.

Sara took a deep breath.

"She had a drug problem last year. She was in a very abusive relationship. Her parents and family mentally and emotionally abused her. Her ex boyfriend raped her. She has had physical abuse, sexual abuse, and mental and verbal abuse from most of the people who were her family or who claimed to care about her. She blames herself for everything ever since her ex. It got so much better after she met her husband. She is a different person" Sara hoped it would be enough without providing details.

"Something happened that triggered this. She is reverting to a place of behavior that is familiar and rebellious, which probably helped her in the past to cope. It is her way of avoiding whatever she was going through. Has she ever discussed her fears with you?" he asked trying to think ahead.

"The thing she is most afraid of is abandonment. Her parents used to say they were leaving for good and would go buy alcohol and come back. She is most afraid of being alone and abandoned," she said calmly.

"She may have felt alone if he was in and out most of the time," he added.

"No, she was fine taking care of him. When she gets like that she denies there is a problem. There is no way she could deny the situation she was in. It has to be something else" she still couldn't figure this out.

"Do you think she will talk to a counselor?" he asked hopefully.

Sara shook her head truthfully.

"Once her husband gets here she will get better. He is very supportive and has a way of reaching her that only a few of us have stuck around long enough to discover" she frowned.

"He may help but she will need long term help. I have no doubt he can reach her but not until she wants to, and that is not the permanent answer. Something happened out there she hasn't shared. Has she said anything other than what we know?"

Sara shook her head again.

"Let me know when he comes please" he patted her on the arm hoping it would help her stress but knew it wouldn't. He left and she stood looking through the glass at Mark who was watching with eagle eyes. She took a deep breath and walked back in the room with a halfhearted smile.

"What's wrong?" he asked knowing there was something happening.

"He just wanted to know if she is allergic to anything" she hated to lie but didn't want to see him get any more upset than he already was.

"You are a terrible liar Sara" he glared at her. She looked up at him and wasn't sure what to do.

"There was a problem but it's taken care of. She might be getting sick is all" she was hoping that would be enough.

"What kind of problem?" he asked with almost a growl. Sara looked at him for a long time. She didn't want to tell him the truth but knew at this point she had to. Not telling him was making him more upset.

"She tried to leave. They had to sedate her again," she said feeling another tear trickling down.

"Tried to leave" he said plainly. "I want to see her and have a little talk" Sara could see anger in his green eyes.

"She was already here when you were asleep. I don't think she handled it well" she brushed the tear away and started cursing herself for the idea.

"She was already here?" he asked angrily.

Sara nodded and he started pushing his elbows down to rise up again.

"Don't make me call him in here to sedate you too" she said hugging him.

"Damn it Sara. Why didn't you wait? She hasn't seen me awake since this started. That was stupid," he screamed.

He saw tears rolling down her cheeks and could feel her shaking sobs. He realized what he had done after he already did it. He grabbed on to her and tried to hold her.

"I'm sorry," he whispered in her ear. She continued crying for a few more minutes. He could feel the gown was wet under her cheek and was now mad at himself for losing his cool. He had never yelled at her before except during an argument.

"I shouldn't have brought her in here but I thought it would help" she said brushing the tears away.

"You didn't know. You know how she gets. Damn, I wish I could talk to her" he felt himself get more frustrated and that was only upsetting Sara more.

After a few minutes she calmed down and he was still holding her. Slowly she stood up and dropped into the chair next to him.

"You should go to the hotel" he could tell she was exhausted because she didn't lose her composure that easily.

"I am not going anywhere until Adam gets here" she answered quickly.

"I shouldn't have taken her out on that bike. That kid can't get a break no matter what," he said shaking his head.

"Have you ever told her why you are so close?" she looked at him knowing.

He shook his head no.  
"You should tell her. Sometimes she feels like she is the only one in the world who has ever been abused or depressed" she knew what a sensitive subject that was to Mark. She could see him visibly become uncomfortable.

"I can't tell her that Sara. I want to forget it myself half the time. I want to forget her, that was a long time ago and I can't change it now. I couldn't help her, maybe I can help Angel," he said looking away from her.

"Pretending it didn't happen won't help anyone. She should know why you are so close to her and not just being a father figure" she said but he still wouldn't look at her.

"Subject is closed Sara. I will someday but not today" he looked back at her and smiled. He hated cutting her off but this time he had to.

"I am going to go check on her. I will be back," she said kissing him again.

"I still want to see her, when I am awake this time" he said with no humor in his voice.

"I will ask but he doctor didn't recommend it the first time. He almost put her in restraints the last time" she added and winced to herself as soon as the words came out.

"What!" he shouted.

Sara was cursing herself. He still didn't know the whole story and didn't think he should right now.

"Get his ass in here right now" he shouted lifting himself by his elbows again. Sara saw his face turn a shade of red that she only saw when he was losing control.

"She isn't in them right now Mark. She fought with two orderlies and they had to hold her down. She tried to leave and was hurting herself," she said trying to hold him.

"I don't care! If he puts anything on her I will kill him myself" he was gritting his teeth together at the pain his movement was causing.

"Stop it Mark. You are doing exactly what she did. Stop!" she yelled at him with all the bravado she could muster.  
"Why did she try to leave? There is more Sara and I want to know right now. She wouldn't leave unless there was something else going on. Either tell me now or I will drag myself down there and see for myself" he yelled and some people were starting to look in the room.

"There is nothing going on. There was a little mix up and they are handling it" she yelled right back.

"Don't lie to me Sara. What kind of mix up?" he demanded his green eyes were piercing right through her soul.

"I cant tell you because look at how you are acting now" she tried to counter. He simply stared at her until he saw her beginning to crack. He took a deep breath and tried to calm down.

"Tell me what it is. I can't lay here and wonder. I want the truth. That is the only thing I have ever asked from you," he said very seriously.

Sara took a deep breath and looked at the floor.

"Promise me you wont freak out," she asked hopefully. Inside he could feel his stomach twist. He slowly nodded.

"There was a mix up on her orders. They were supposed to be giving small doses of mild painkillers for her back. A nurse didn't read the complete orders and they were giving her something else," she said hoping it would be enough but knowing it wouldn't.

"What were they giving her" he could feel his anger rising again.

"Morphine" she said simply.

His eyes shut and he could feel that he lost his breath, as easily as if she had hit him.

Sara saw him start to visually shake in anger. He started punching the side of the mattress with his fist as hard as he could. There had only been a few times she saw him lose control like that and it scared her. She took a step back.

Sara heard the door open and saw the doctor step in with a worried look on his face.

"What's going on in here? His blood pressure and heart rate just went sky high" he looked and saw the expression on Mark's face and saw Sara step in front of him.

"You bastard!" Mark screamed at him. Mark grabbed the only thing he could reach, the metal bowl on the table next to his bed. He threw it as hard as he could with his good hand. Luckily he didn't throw it at either of them but the impact cracked one of the windows. Mark now felt the pain the movement caused and dropped his head back down hard on the pillow.

A nurse heard the commotion and came running in with a syringe she handed to the doctor.  
"You put me out and you will live to regret it," Mark screamed at him.

The doctor stood there with the syringe and had a look of terror in his eyes. He stood looking back and forth at Sara and Mark wondering which course of action was safer. Slowly he dropped the syringe in his pocket.

"What is going on?" he asked softly but sternly. His first concern was his patient over his own safety.

"You gave her morphine you son of a bitch" Mark screamed at the man who instantly closed his eyes.

"There was a mix up on the orders. The nurse who gave it has been suspended. She only had a few doses" he offered in a feeble defense.

"She shouldn't have had any. It was your responsibility and not some nurse" he spat back still shaking in anger.

"You're right" was all he could say.

Sara saw that Mark was trying to calm down. The redness was leaving his face and she could see him trying to take deep breaths. She could also see the look of pain on his face.

"I want to see her as soon as she wakes up. I want to be awake this time and if you give me any shit you will regret it" he said very seriously.

The doctor started to shake his head. Mark took his one good arm and grabbed the rail of the bed and started to pull himself up. After a few quick attempts he was sitting upright. The doctor looked at him in almost fear. If he were almost his height sitting up what would he be standing up?

"Calm down Mr. Calaway. You could be injuring yourself worse. I am afraid her seeing you would only make things worse for her. She didn't respond well the first time. We are waiting for her husband to come. Maybe then we can try it again" he tried to say calmly.

"I will see her as soon as she wakes up, I will drag myself down there if I have to" Mark shot him his most menacing look in his arsenal. The doctor finally nodded in defeat.

"Do you feel up to a check on your status?" he asked carefully.

"Do you feel up to a punch in the mouth?" Mark shot back.

"Mark! Stop it. It wasn't his fault. Lay down there and let him do his job" she walked over to him and put her hand on his chest. Slowly he lowered himself down gritting his teeth the whole way. "I don't know which one of you acts more like a kid, you or her!" He gave her a look that reminded Sara of embarrassment. Mark gave her a slight smile, which she returned.

The doctor stood at a safe distance until he got a nod from Sara. Slowly he reached and pulled the sheets back. He pulled out the pin and waited until he closed his eyes.

He gently pushed the pin on the toes of his broken leg. He looked at Marks face for some sign that he felt it. He noticed a slight frown.

"Did you feel that?" he asked hopefully.

"I didn't feel pain but I felt a tingly numb kind of feeling" he said keeping his eyes shut.

Sara noticed a slight smile on the doctors face as he moved to the other leg. He pushed the pin on his foot.  
"How about that?" he asked.

"Same thing" Mark said quickly.

He moved the pin higher up on his leg.

"That hurt!" Mark said feeling his own excitement. Sara could feel tears in her eyes.

"That is very encouraging. With injuries like this the effects go downward. They are the same in healing. The further down you go the longer it takes. Can you try moving your legs at all?" they both looked at the same thing.

With great effort and concentration they saw him move his good foot slightly, barely enough to be seen but it was movement. There was no movement on his bad leg.

"That's enough for now. You must be a fast healer. Your broken leg will take longer but I think with time you will be all right" he said smiling.

"Will I wrestle again?" Mark asked

The doctor stared at him for quite a while.

"I can't answer that. Let's concentrate on getting you walking before we worry about wrestling" he said hopefully.

Mark nodded in return and took a deep breath.

"I want to see Angel when she wakes up. I mean it. I have to talk to her and get this fixed" Mark gave the doctor his most serious look in his arsenal.

"That will depend on her and how she is when she wakes up" the doctor added quickly, "I will be back later or when she wakes up" he added and left the room.

Sara grabbed his good hand and held it tightly.

Angel opened her eyes and squinted at the brightness coming in the window. She looked around the empty room trying to remember what had gone on. As the memories of the fight came back she began to fill with the same feelings that caused the outburst in the first place. Tears rolled down her cheeks as the guilt burned through her.

She looked down at the IV she felt in her arm. She started coughing a painful cough and felt like her lungs were on fire. She tried to take a deep breath but found she couldnt. Only now did she find the irony of the ribbing about her smoking. After a moment her breath came back and she heard the door opening. Sara walked with a smile. Angel saw the dark circles under her eyes and the exhausted look on her face. Sara slowly sat down next to her like she had so many times in the past day.

"I have good news for you" she said still smiling.

Angel looked past her at the wall and showed no emotion. This reaction didnt go unnoticed as Sara was hoping anything would pick her up right now. Angel started coughing again and Sara instantly heard the congestion. She waited until Angel caught her breath and continued.

"Adam is on his way. He will be here in about an hour. They had him on a flight that had to land because of the weather. He is driving here from Cleveland because a snowstorm closed Buffalo" Sara was still smiling and Angel was still staring. She at least expected a smile or excitement. This was her most feared reaction. She was shutting down again like she had done with Matt. There was nothing except the empty shell of a person she had seen before.

"Aren't you even happy he is coming? Is this how you are going to be? This won't help you or Mark. Mark wants to see you. He is not at all happy that he was asleep the last time. He wants to talk to you" Sara tried to look into her eyes and was surprised when Angel's gaze went from no reaction and sadness to one of intensity and clarity. Sara felt her heart drop when Angel said nothing but softly shook her head no. Although it broke her heart to do it she still played the tough love card. If Angel shut off again worse could happen this time.

"If you don't come down to see him he will come to see you. He already hurt himself trying to do that. He is hurting and I am tired of watching my best friend and my husband in pain. I am not going to play your game. Adam will be here and when he does we will all go and see Mark. Besides he has a surprise for you" Sara gently reached to touch her bandaged hand and was hurt when the hand was pulled away. Sara grabbed it anyway.

"You wont shut me off like this. I wont let you give up. We will all get through this."  
Angel continued to look past her to the wall. After a while Sara gave up and went out into the hall.

Unable to handle the stress and exhaustion anymore she leaned against the wall and slid down. Her hands covered her eyes and she could feel eyes watching her sobs. After a minute she heard a gentle voice that instantly made her stop. She looked to see Adam kneeling in front of her and her arms flew around him. He looked more tired than she. She felt the days worth of beard scratch her cheek.

After a minute of hugging she felt him help her up and saw him smile.

"How is she?" he asked.

"She won't even talk to me now. She wont say anything. She just stares. I told her that Mark wanted to see her and all she did was shake her head no. She is worse than the last time I talked to you. The doctor wanted me to let him know when you get here. You go in and see her and I will go tell him." she hugged him again lightly and turned.

Adam took a deep breath and picked up his duffle bag and slowly opened the door. He stepped inside. Her eyes were closed. Putting down the bag he sat down next to her on the bed.

Angel's eyes flew open as she felt the bed move. Tears instantly welled in her eyes. Painfully she tried to rise up and hug him. He bent down and hugged her firmly. He felt his own tears falling. After a few minutes of sobbing on both sides he gently lay her back down and kissed her lightly on the lips.

"How do you feel?" he asked her with a slight smile on his face, he had already gotten his end of the running joke many times before.

At first Angel didnt have the words to answer him. She didnt want to say anything in the hopes that if she didnt talk the reality didnt happen. Her cough started again but this time was bad enough that she had to sit up. Adam started to get alarmed by the flush now in her cheeks but the spell soon passed.

"I think I smoked too many cigarettes" she offered as a feeble attempt to joke. She reached out to grab his hand and was frustrated that she couldnt because of the bandages. He saw her agitation and gently picked up her hand in both of his. After a minute of silence he touched her chin and moved it up to look her in the eyes.

"This wansn't your fault. It was an accident. You did everything you could. You probably saved his life. I have been talking to Sara off and on since I left and I want to know why you tried to leave. I want to know how you could hurt me by hurting yourself?" His blue eyes pierced through her and she now felt more pain.

"I wanted to get to you, or get out of here." she said quietly.

"I think you wanted to run. And no matter how far you run this wont go away. It still happend. And it wasnt your fault. I think there was another reason why you wanted to leave and it had nothing to do with Mark or Sara or me." she looked at him questioning.

"You know what I am talking about Angel. You wont get it here and you wont get it when you leave either. If I see any signs you are using again, I will put you in rehab.You are going to have to deal with this the hard way. And you are going to see Mark and we will be with you."


	6. Chapter 6

Thank you everyone for the great reviews. I am sorry for the lack of updates. My father died in March and I have been avoiding writing so I dont write my own feelings into the storyline. I know this story can be dark to begin with and I dont want it to be a reflection of my own feelings. Instead I am waiting for it to be what it was originally. My own escape and creative outlet. As soon as I am able I will update. I plan on finishing it but I am not sure of when. I have not written anything since before March. As soon as I know I can write with a clear mind I will update. Thanks again for all the positive reviews. It has helped me alot in the last few months and reminds me I have a place to go when I am able to get there. Lisa.


	7. Chapter 7

Sorry I havent updated this story.I havent written a word since my dad passed away.If anyone wants to adopt this story and finish it please let me know.I would love to see what someone else can do and would love to see the ending..


	8. Chapter 8

HI ALL. I have gotten a few emails asking for an update. I havent added to this story since my last update. I did intend to get back to it long before this. I promise you I will finish it. The ideas just dont flow as easy as it did before. I have been thinking about possible directions as I have forgotten what I originally had in mind. But hopefully soon I can start plugging away again and finish it up for you.I just wanted to warn you guys that if I am not able to pick up where I was or remember where I was going I am thinking about deleting the last couple chapters and rewriting them to go in whatever direction I head since anything I write is totally off the top of my head at the moment. I only pass things through a spell checker so i have no notes to check. If/when I update I will try to put a disclaimer on there to reread the new material for it to make again I am not sure if I will or just try to continue from where I was. Thanks for being patient!


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